YET MORE WHOPPERS BY JESSICA TETREAU: HER (PRE-USA) 300-YEAR-OLD-BED OF CHILDHOOD FANTASIES

By Juan Montoya
It all started out simple enough with a photo posted by City Commissioner Jessica Kalifa-Tetreau of her old bedroom at her parents' home.
She posted that she was "visiting my old bedroom in my parents' house. I've spent countless hours wishing on stars out of that window," referring to the photo she posted online.
Well, that was certainly nice. Most of us have fond memories of our younger days when we were at home with our parents.
But she couldn't leave well enough alone.
When a commenter posted that the old bed in the picture was nice, Klaifa-Tetreau posted that "it's been in family since the 1700s."
OK.
We are to believe that the Tetreaus have been lugging around that same piece of furniture for the last 300 or so years? There must have been quite a bit of empty space on the Mayflower when the Tetreau immigrant family made the trip over the pond, then.
But seriously, folks.
This is not out of character for the good commish. After a protracted celebration of her "historical" and Providential write-in victory over despised Charlie Atkinson, she has taken to magnify her importance to the cultural and economic development of the city. We're not arguing that she doesn't have a touch of the cheerleader in her, though.
When the commissioners and their brothers went out to extend the red carpet to SpaceX to set up their commercial satellite launch pad on the lomas of Boca Chica, she showed up in appropriate blue with a company logo along with her son in a SpaceX  jumpsuit.
And more recently, after a local story in the newspaper appeared which pointed out the newsworthiness of a new business opening up on the corner of Old Port Isabel and Boca Chica sandwiched between Walmart and the Kentuch Fried Chicken franchise, she took the opportunity to thank those who had helped her "revive" her district.
Nowhere in the article was she or her political jurisdiction ever mentioned, and we commented at the time at our wonderment that Jessica's sphere of influence could extend as far as Bexar County and draw investors flocking to her district. That's quite a reach, isn't it?
Well, saying that that particular bed has been in the family for the better part 300 years is also a bit much for folks to believe.
Three hundred years ago the black hole of the Milky Way gave off a tremendous burst. A tsunami rocked Japan. And the Tetreaus were lugging a bed across fire and revolution in the New England colonies until, lo and behold, 300 years later, it lies yonder in Jessica's folks' crib.